Ben Folds Five "Bizzare Christmas Incident" |
(OK Grandpa, let's tell them a little story about what happened this Christmas) Christmas eve I didn't get much sleep I kept hearing things Heavy breathing from the chimney Who could it be? In the morn I couldn't believe my eyes A whale of a corpse With a long white beard was dangling over the fire (Chorus) Santa he's a big fat f*uck Crawled down the chimney got his fat ass stuck Honey call the lawyers fast �Cause Mrs. Claus is gonna sue my ass (OK Grandpa, step up, sing in this thing right here, tell �em what you saw) Gotta tell you folks He wasn't wearing no clothes He musta rubbed a whole gallon of Crisco oil from his head down to his toes I was talking to the cops outside The dogs were lickin' Crisco off of his thighs They hauled him away in a double wide What a sad sad way to die (Chorus) Lyric from www.lyricmania.com |