Adam Sandler - The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions Lyrics

And now a Bafoon's meeting with
The Dean of Admissions at a prostigeous college

Well Micheal i'd like to extend my warmest
congradulations on you're up comming graduation
and I understand you're interested in matriculating
here in fall

I got a snake man!

Yes pets are welcome here on campus be at
a dog,or cat and even the occasional reptile.

One time i fed it some beer man,it was slivering
this way and that! It was all fucked up!

I'm sure it was.Well we discourage inapropriate
drinking among both students AND pets here on campus

FUCKING SHIT!

Yes, that's a not-uncommon reaction to this policy.
So tell me a little bit more about you're background.

My father's a fucking ass hole man!

Hmm, I see. Your fellings of rebellion
are not unusual at your age son.

My mother's a piece of shit too!

Well I hope you can find an outlet for you're hospility
over the summer...So you can come to school in the fall
relaxed and ready to learn.

My teacher in High School was a stupid bitch man!
She had her head way up her ass!

Well the quality of the faculty of the university such as ours
far exceeds that of a public high school.

You're secratery is a real fat bitch man!

Yes she tried many diets over the years with minimal success.

I had diearhea last month, I had to shit all fucking day!

Uh huh...Well we all get the ocasional stomach bug,
never a pleasurable experience...So, have you given
any though to your choise of major?

I got a big fucking boner right now!

Um..I see. Well sexual harassel is not uncommon during
periods of nervous tension,I don't take offence.

One time I ate my neighbour's shit!

It's understandable. Well I enjoyed meeting you and
we'll send you our descision at the end of the month.

I bet you have really harry balls!

Yes..It's a heritable forest down there.Bye-Bye.